Dogs Are Republican - Cats Are Democrat


Cats are obviously Democrat.
They live in an urban setting,
they prefer to stay close to home,
and are touchy feely while petting.

Dogs are Republican and far more rural,
they are disciplined and obedient.
They can be natural leaders
but trade long-term for what is expedient.

Dogs love adventure, and are tougher on crime,
while felines prefer staying at home.
Dogs stick their noses into everyone’s business
and redistrict territory as they roam.

Cats live and let live, are socially open,
and are more likely to experiment with herbs.
Left to themselves, dogs destroy the place,
then when one barks, they all get disturbed.

Dogs worship at the feet of a higher power
cats seemingly could not care less.
While dogs seek to serve obsequiously
cats are a good deal harder to impress.

Cats do not follow, they do not lead
sometimes they just get in the way.
Dogs do not demand entitlement
they’re convinced they will each have their day.

So while some have nothing but love for their dog,
and others prefer to idealize the cat,
it is clear that canines are all Republicans
and felines are, as a whole, Democrat.

This was inspired by the brilliant political cartoonist Kirk Anderson.

After I first published this poem in 2009, I wrote to the artist telling him how I had shamelessly put his very clever cartoon into verse, and received the following note:

Thanks, I’m flattered! Please mention that it was inspired by the cartoon, and link to the cartoon here:

While I’m at it, I might as well shamelessly huckster my swag: You can buy a poster of it for $8.99 + $3.99 shipping (regardless of how many posters, shipping is $3.99 – it costs just as much to send 10 posters as 1!). And if you like my work, you might be interested in my new book, which you can find out about here:

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