The Night We Split
Break ups suck, don't they? I mean, there are almost NO stories about breakups that go smoothly, parting as friends, see ya 'round, wanna meet my friend?
Most breakups involve tears, anger, recriminations, harsh words, cussing and the occasional mean-spirited jab, right where it hurts.
It's been a long time for me personally, but I still recall how it feels, or at least, how it felt to me.
This piece is about one such breakup, oh, mid-twenties or so, when the obvious solution is to pick up someone else just as desperate and continue as if nothing happened.
THE NIGHT WE SPLIT
Trying hard not to remember, I drink.
Plotting my course by the unsteady shadow I cast,
I leave the bar, my head beating like a heart.
I walk, drunkenly, until I can walk no more;
then I drink.
Steel encases the heart and chest,
to prevent breaking,
while warmth enough to fight the cold
pretends to live within me.
The buzz passes quickly,
more quickly than I’d like;
dying faster than a politician’s popularity.
It hits the head first, making me
judge and slap-happy jury,
with the dangerous executioner
nowhere to be seen.
I recall every joke, tall tale, and line of crap
that I came armed with,
a sloppy parody of charm.
From there it fogs, eyes seeing only the resplendent.
Emboldened by light I press on.
My gifts are a tongue that cannot be tied,
a point of view unlike the norm,
and a singularity of purpose.
There is nothing like
my own name
whispered hot and salted
into my ear
to make me forget why I hurt,
or at least forget why I cared.
I lose myself in perfumed flesh.
The hardest part of not recalling
what you want to consign to oblivion
is forgetting
that you do not want to remember.
-----
©2010 Christopher Reilley
The Night We Split appeared in Grief Tattoos, which is out of print, Kindle edition HERE.
I would love to know what you thought about this piece.
Please consider leaving a comment.
your verse keeps disappearing...really weird...when i scrool down. now that i clicked on the comments it is staying...just thought you might want to know...
ReplyDeleteinteresting verse...and break ups do such...it shakes your foundation...and depening on why it stips you of trust in something you once believed in....
thanks for linking up with oneshot!
I had the same problem as Brian and was glad to see the poem stick around when I clicked on comments. :)
ReplyDeleteThis poem is so sad. Breaking up does suck - no doubts about it. Your line about politician's popularity was a great one.
Yes breaking up can literealy mean that for one or both parties
ReplyDelete"Steel encases the heart and chest,
to prevent breaking"
Oh that says it all
(I had no trouble with the disappearing verse.)
ReplyDeleteThis is so sad. Those we have loved know us best, and so have the most power to hurt us. I really liked the last stanza (on the continuation), and the phrase, "a tongue that cannot be tied."
Yes - break-ups cause such a lot of heartbreak - and you find good words for it
ReplyDelete...dying faster than a politician’s popularity..is my favorite!
Not at all a pleasant situation, I am sure...
ReplyDeleteAnd then it makes you do things you never even dreamt you would do!
"The hardest part of not recalling
what you want to consign to oblivion
is forgetting
that you do not want to remember." - Sad, but very precisely and beautifully put lines!!!
A great One Shot!